Personal share: Learning Astrology Through the Retrograde Planets

Personal Astrology Share….

If you want to understand Astrology you have to look at the patterns it presents.

In my natal chart I have a retrograde Venus (love, money, values) in the 12th house (self-sabotaging behaviors, deep subconscious work). My whole life has been centered around this deep wound that I do not belong. I have been trying to heal this in different layers, just like peeling an onion, sometimes you have to go dry your eyes before you get back to it. It is certainly not a linear process!

Well in January of 23′ we experienced a Venus Retrograde that was going over my Natal Venus retro. in Aquarius. There has been so much that has come to the surface in really pivotal ways since then. It has given me insights on my wound identity and how I needed to reprogram my mind in a healthier manner.

See, Venus rules my 3rd house of communication and the way I connect with others. It also rules my 8th house of transformation, psychological baggage, and fears.

So, my pattern is that I get completely overwhelmed and shut down, sometimes even disengaging with the world around me. I feel so much safer in isolation without anyone around.

This is a learned response since I was too young to remember, so as you can understand it has been a hard learned habit to break.

For this reason, I had to work with my self-beliefs around what I THOUGHT OF MYSELF. That is where the work really is. This is the new realization that I had now that Mars retrograde is opposite my natal retro. Venus. I have to change my mind around the beliefs I hold, like how I imagine people may or may not feel or think of me. I don’t really know what they are feeling unless they say it directly. So, I was believing this made-up story of what my “wounded parts thought”. I have to release the control or thoughts that is really beyond my control about what they think or feel. LOTS OF DEEP SHADOW WORK and learning to stop my self-sabotage out of fear that I will be hurt or taken advantage of.

In my past, I’ve continuously made myself smaller so I can go undetected or unnoticed. This has played into my wounded belief that I don’t matter.

CURRENT DAY>>>

Today, I have my natal Venus return (A new 18-month cycle is beginning). There were some more healing insights that I have gathered and processed, due to it being opposed by the Mars Retrograde and conjunct Pluto. The main message was “I AM ENOUGH” I am enough in my wounded state, I am enough in my healed state, I am enough for the world, I am enough for the space in which I reside, I AM ENOUGH FOR ME!

Huge realization for me! I have been working on reprogramming my mind, my WHOLE LIFE! I remember having these thoughts when I was 5!
“I will never be like this when I am an adult”
“I will never go through these things when I am an adult”
“I will never act like this when I am adult”

I have studied behavior ever since I was a child so I can understand WHAT NOT TO DO!

Having retrograde planets in your natal chart is a huge inside job! It really deals with your inner thoughts and how you must go back over something, in order to reprogram and bring light over situations or stories that you tell yourself.

I also believe that the Venus retrograde that I have in my chart has caused physical ailments due to the psychological stories I have witnessed and believed my whole life.

Anybody ready “The body keeps the score” by Bessel A. Van Der Kolk? or “The Myth of Normal” by Dr. Gabor Mate? These books help confirm my thoughts. That is why shadow work is so, so important! Specially if you have inner planets that are retrograde (Mercury, Venus, Mars)!

If I have kept your attention this whole time, hey, I appreciate you! I appreciate your interest in what I have to say! That is also, a huge wound for me! I never thought what I had to say was important and just choose to keep silent.

This page and Astrology profession, constantly reprograms my mind to a better narrative, that people are interested, and I am valuable to others.

If you need any assistance with any retrograde planets or doing shadow work reach out! I’d love to have a conversation about it! It’s been my life’s work!

~Amanda~